My Understanding vs. His Plan

Proverbs 3:5-6 
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
   and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
   and he will make your paths straight.

These were the first verses that made sense to me after I was saved 15 years ago.  The first ones that I tore out of a bulletin at CFC and took back to college with me and pinned up on my bulletin board.  I think it comforted me to know it was safe to trust Him and that I shouldn't trust myself and my ideas over Him.  But, it has continued to be one of my favorite passages - it always, always seems to apply.

The devotion out of Jesus Calling for January 27th (I was off a day this morning - oops!):

Trust is a golden pathway to heaven.  When you walk on this path you live above your circumstances.  My glorious Light shines more brightly on those who follow this path of Life.  Dare to walk on the high road with Me, for it is the most direct route to heaven.  The low road is circuitous:  twisting and turning in agonizing knots.  There the air hangs heavy, and dark, ominous clouds predominate.  Relying on your own understanding will weigh you down.  Trust in Me absolutely, and I will make your path straight.

This week I continue to struggle with anxiety over the timing of the house sale.  Shocker, huh?  Ha ha ha...believe me, I wish I could get past this!  The devotion above described how I've been - twisting and turning in agonizing knots - heavy air - dark clouds - weighed down.  And why?  Because I am leaning on my OWN understanding.  MY understanding says - life will be better if we don't have two house payments.  But, I am not trusting Him with all my heart.  I do at times.  I want to all of the time.  But it is a constant and conscious submission that I have to exercise.  I used to think that I was weak when I had to give Him things over and over, but now I know that this is a part of life.  And, as I continue to turn things over to Him and exercise my faith and trust Him with all of my heart - habits are formed and I get better at it...  I'm getting there - so thankful for continued reminders, teachings, and rebukes that He sends my way through songs, devotions, somethings someone says, a sweet message, etc.  He is so patient with us...and so caring.

Lord, help me to walk with You above my circumstances as I completely trust You with all of my heart.  Let me not think about and dwell on what 'makes sense' to me.  Help me to submit fully to You - You have control - it is better that way - because your plans for me are good.  I have been complaining that I can't fully enjoy it here because our house hasn't sold - that is a lie because I can do all things in You.  You can allow me to enjoy life to the fullest now - not later after things are 'better' but NOW.  Forgive me for pouting, for wanting my way - and thinking that my way makes more sense.  Lord help me to rest in Your plan, Your perfect plan.  I want to enjoy the straight path that You make for me - no more twisting, knotted path that I make for myself.  Please help me to draw from the strength that You have placed in me and to trust in You completely.  Thank You that You are so patient and caring with me.  Amen.