Ryan Home's redid our yard this week - digging out the big rocks, aerating, reseeding, spreading some topsoil, etc. Now comes the watering so that grass hopefully grows!! Excited about the prospect of a back yard with grass!!
Tuesday morning I had an interview for a prn (means I can pick my own schedule) RN position at the hospital in Monroe - it's about 20-25 minutes away, but in the opposite direction of Charlotte - so less traffic. It is for a medical surgical unit and it is 12 hour night shifts. I can't say I'm jumping up and down about the idea of working. But, I have gotten a little excited about learning again and getting my foot back in the door. I really did love working in the hospital - but that was 12 years ago! I think more than anything I am nervous about not knowing enough since it has been so long. I am praying for God's perfect plan to be clear and obvious to both Jeff and I and for His will to be done concerning working - and for Him to arrange things perfectly if I am to work. I have not heard back on this, but feel pretty good about it.
This week we also were contacted by some friends who need a place to stay for six months while they are building a new home. Scott and Lori are by far some of the most neatest, cleanest people I've ever met so we were definitely interested in talking this through. After Jeff spent time talking to our realtor and Scott, we've decided to rent our house to them until the end of March. We are taking it off of the market now (we've had NO activity lately - so sad) and going to put it back out there in February - just in time for spring. Scott and Lori graciously will accommodate showings and hopefully we will sell the house before their lease is up!! God is providing for us through this. God told me 'soon' a few weeks ago when I asked "how long?" I am not proud of the reaction I had about the renting/taking the house off the market thing. I have to be honest that I cried...because I was sad and hurt and mad and disappointed. What a brat I am! You see, when I heard from Him, I was comforted that He encouraged me and that He hadn't forgotten about me, but I decided what He must mean by that one word. I was convinced when God told me 'soon,' that our house was going to sell. So any thing other than that was not looking to me like what was supposed to happen. Luckily it only took me a few minutes to get over my little fit and realize what a brat I was being. He loves us, He remembers us, He encourages us, He provides for us. I have every reason to feel blessed. Every reason to rejoice in His promises and His care. To praise Him. And just thank Him for providing for us during this situation even though He isn't removing us from this situation right now. He is right there walking right beside us - He has not forgotten us. He is not finished with us though. We have more to learn - as evidenced by my interpretation of God's meaning when He said one word to me and the fit I threw when it didn't go that way.
He has given us our daily bread, our manna. He has provided for us right now. We have left the complete comfort of our 'perfectly laid out life' in our Egypt and followed, now we are grumbling in the desert while He tries to teach us complete dependence on Him before He delivers us completely to our promised land. 'This is your portion for today. You will have to trust me for tomorrow's. Do not try to take matters in your own hands and collect more - it will not work.'
Lysa TerKeurst writes in What Happens When Women Walk in Faith, "We are amazingly similar to the children of Israel. We spend half our lives looking back at our own Egypt with selective memories, longing to have our comfort zone back. Then we spend the other half wishing our days away for a dreamy future in our own promised land. The short time we actually focus on today's journey is often wasted on complaining, grumbling, wishing to be in a different place, or simply and mindlessly going through the motions of life. Why do we struggle with embracing the moment we've been given and experiencing God in the here and now?"This morning, the high school pastor challenged us in his sermon on Philippians - Where is your joy found? Your focus in life, in your situations and your circumstances, should be first on J Jesus. Then on O Others. And lastly Y You. Joy starts with Jesus, not myself. If I am worrying about how great things used to be in Egypt, or longing for my circumstances to be better and us to arrive at that place of the promised land, then my focus is on myself.
In response to this change of events, we will continue in dependence on Him for our daily bread, exercising and growing our patience and faith, and embracing joy in this moment. We will praise Him for His answer to our prayers and for giving me encouragement and following through on that. And I have humbly learned again: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9
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