Some of What I've Learned

A year ago today we left the comforts of a lifetime in Indiana cornfields and drove to the blue skies of North Carolina. We went through some crazy emotions of loneliness, sadness, anger, excitement, happiness, and jealousy.  We got used to setting our GPS every time we went anywhere.  We got used to introducing ourselves and telling where we came from.  Slowly we have put down roots in NC and cut ties in Indiana.  And today, one year later...we are blessed beyond measure - we love it here.  Our home is here and it is truly where we want to be.  God has done this.  I never wanted to leave Indiana. 

In a year's time you can learn a lot.  Especially when you are grieving on so many different levels.  Especially when most everything/everyone you know is gone.  Here are some of the things I've learned.

• It's ok to cry - even in front of others!
• Getting involved in what we love right away was good for us in so many ways.
• Writing makes it much easier for me to express my emotions, pick things apart, and release my frustrations.
• It's one thing to have a lot of acquaintances, but to have one or two real sister in Christ friends is absolutely a blessing like no other!  Getting redirected back to His promises over and over and over and over by these women have helped me get through this.  Their patience is amazing.  
• Grieving takes quite a while.  Once you think you have one thing dealt with another pops up.  You can't rush it or will it to end.  You have to experience it so it is dealt with when it does end.
• If you've gone through a big move in the past - you understand - you can relate - and you encourage those who are going through it SO much.  I felt so much more comforted when I was talking to or with those who 'got it.'  Not that those who haven't can't - but just not to the same level.
• We have really fun and special times with our family when we see them now since we aren't seeing them every other day.
• When making new friends - you can't wait on them to make the first, second, third moves.  I have to get off my butt and invite invite invite!  Most are too busy to think of doing it themselves, but love it when you do.
• My passion is still connecting other women to other women in order that every woman feels encouraged and loved and a sense of belonging and knows His peace and love through others.
• Another passion of mine is emerging - a sense of urgency that the lost in our own little worlds would know Him and what He has to offer before this life is over. 
• Some friends I thought were friends weren't such good friends.
• Some friends I thought weren't friends were good friends.
• I love to belong to a women's Bible study, but I don't love to lead them.
• Jeff and I are each others family here. He and the kids are most important to me.  Period.
• It is hard to keep in touch with friends when you move, but those "pick up where you left off with" ones are precious.
• You can endure anything for a time.  We drove 2 hours a day for 10 weeks when we first got here last year.  We have now had our house on the market twice - but since July of last year have had this burden.  And not just endure - live...and live joyfully...and learn and grow!!
• We were saved from a situation in Evansville where Jeff would have lost his job earlier this year.  The loose ends of this transition are not tied up yet - but this is where God wanted us.  
• We have no regrets about moving here - because this is where God told us to go.  If we would have stayed because of fear or doubt, I am positive we would have regretted it.
• Jeff and I CAN do handy things around the house without my mom and dad - we just had to try!
• Sunshine, blue skies, and working in landscaping makes me giddy happy!
• It is a pain to move to another state.  Just the work for all of your stuff is enough.  But, the switching of driver's license/plates/registration, voting, address changes, insurances, utilities, nursing license, etc - it has been a job to get it all switched!  
• Talk to new people like they are old friends - it's easier and more comfortable :) They get to see who I am immediately!
• Surround myself with those reflect Him and help me to be a better me.  I need not bother with drama of relationships that I know are not healthy for me.
• It is fun to have the ability to have guests stay with us.  We have been so happy to have had so many people pass through Charlotte and see us or come just to see us!
• Tithing is important and an act of obedience and trust.  I'm learning to do it with a joyful heart.
• Time with Emily is becoming more and more important as these years go by.  We now are having 'girl time' every single night were we can talk about anything and do some devotions together.  
• Patience - ok, well, I'm haven't learned this one.  I'm 'learning' this one.  Everything has been about waiting this past year. 
• It's ok to let a mess go in the house.  I can not stay on top of it as easily here...and it is ok.
• Being by myself is ok.  Being over-committed so I'm not by myself is not ok.
• "Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails." Prov 19:21